How to Freak Out Tourists

While writing up my Italy trip which you shall find below, I found in my notes this little list of things I created to, as the title suggests, confuse tourists.
Admittedly, I did not do all of these. But I did manage to get over half of them:

• Pose for a picture, with no-one holding a camera anywhere near you
• Stand in front of monuments and take lots of pictures in the other, wrong, direction
• If possible, change your chosen language every now and then (Can also help to get away from the tourist street sellers. None of them seemed to know any Russian)
• Audibly name every pigeon you see OR loudly tell them to get off the monuments
• Pretend to be a tour guide and make up your own stories and legends (Just don't charge anything. You'll be sure to get a crowd and keep out of trouble)
• Stride up to the front of a tour group and declare the guide a ghost
• If possible, replicate whatever a tour guide is holding up in the air to direct their group, and stand ready at a T-junction
• Look through your camera backwards
• Point at a statue, loudly proclaim "I win, you blinked!" and carry on
• Stare pointedly at an exit sign for a minute; then walk resolutely in the opposite direction
• Use an audio guide as a phone; constantly ask them to speak up or if they're currently in a tunnel

And always, always remember the three Ps:
Photo-bomb, photo-bomb, photo-bomb.